I love this idea you've been exploring! I've been dreaming of a gift economy offline as well.
Also, semi-related - I finished the first book in the Wheel of Time series this week! I'm waiting for the second to come in through Libby and am looking forward to diving in. I think I could easily overwhelm myself with fandom things so if you have any specific recommendations for people who are new, I'd love to check them out.
Discord is probably the best place to actually get to know people. We are really good about keeping spoilers to certain channels for new readers. If you're interested in that (or Twitter) send me an email and I'll get you connected and introduce you.
Thank you so much! I'm excited to go through these! I still don't use discord much and got rid of Twitter (while it was still called Twitter) but I'll let you know if I get up the nerve to try discord!
This, exactly this! I think it's really bad for our mental health to be constantly questioning what value we can provide. We are innately valuable as humans and we need each other outside of a financial exchange model.
I specially decided to CHANGE CAREERS because of the toxicity of the online-content-creator environment in 2020. Since then I have gone to school for two separate skill sets that “have nothing to do with the internet.” But it hasn’t totally worked.
Anything that isn’t entrepreneurial doesn’t hit my creative needs. Anything that IS entrepreneurial requires “an internet presence.”
BUT- your mindset.
The idea of sharing internet gifts and ignoring the “rules of monetization.” That’s something I could get behind.
"We are sailing in the same ship." (I was once told this by a stranger on the London Underground when she realized I was just as lost as she was.) 😂
As you know, I've been circling this particular whirlpool for YEARS trying to find a balance. But it feels like each loop of the spiral I'm getting closer.
The rules are made up and we get to show up and engage in our own ways. It's just hard to remember that when it feels like swimming against the current of everything we've been taught.
I think one of the spectrums of neurodivergence is between the rebels and rule followers. I've always been a rule follower, but the older that I get I think we have a lot to learn from our rebel neurokin.
1. That quote creates this beautiful scene in my head. Thank you for that.
2. I used to think I followed the rules because “that’s how good people” did it. And (thanks upbringing) that is/ was part of it. But also- it’s easier. It’s easier to not rock the ship. It is easier to not go against the grain. It is easier to be a little lazy and follow the rules. Also- there is very little muscle memory “oh I know how this works,” in rebellion.
3. Thank you for allowing me to think out loud in your space.
I can totally get behind the idea of sharing gifts offline. I just started my own business (I'm a mental health therapist in my "real life"?). I've found that while we do need a psychology today profile, I don't get as many clients from this as one may think. My biggest source of referrals are from other therapists who either know me IRL or whose clients have found me and loved me so they added me to their referral list. It's so beautiful to see members of the mental health community helping each other in the private practice setting. You'd think there'd be this competition for clients, but it's just not like that. It would be so amazing if more areas of work were like this now. They used to be before the Internet!
Yes, I think it's easy to get lost in the weeds a bit. There are a lot of people teaching best practices, but the truth is what works will be unique for each of us. I love that you've found a collaborative community for your therapy work. We need more of that!
I love this so much. I keep going back and forth on how to create and be a part of this community space with what I create and share. Even visibility, if you’re not trying to sell things feels like the attention economy. Thank you for the encouragement and practical ideas. And the reminder that we don’t have to build brands. We get to be a part of a community, a movement.
Yes! Even the framework of "attention economy" has an extractive feeling to me. A competition for eyeballs. The beauty of the gift economy is that you gift your time and energy to receiving other people's gifts as well. You don't show up, promote your content, and peace out. If there are enough people doing this it creates a reciprocity of attention that is genuine and authentic. Thank you for commenting.
This brought back memories of ICQ & Ask Jeeves & this really cool website that I loved - I’ve forgotten the name - that worked as a great discovery tool for topics/subjects you errr interested in. It was set up as these different boards & it would send you on wonderful voyages of discovery. I’m so tired of the noise around personal branding and funnels and constant marketing, and the call to monetize everything. I’m trying to find a happy medium between having some things for sale but just letting most things be part of the gift economy.
I love this with my whole heart. I was deeply part of the old internet, of blogging (for free!), of gifting knowledge (for free!), of making friends that would often cross into real life.
I think it changed when Twitter hit a tipping point. people started leaving blogging in 2012 or so. I was resistant as could be but finally left blogging too.
I think this is my struggle here. how do I balance this. and I honestly don't know.
Social media was definitely part of the shift. I stopped blogging because no one commented anymore and just used Instagram instead because that's where the people were. I don't have all the answers, but based on the comments and replies we aren't the only ones feeling this way.
I’m becoming a firm believer that things will appear when you need them most and my, did I need this! I’ve been struggling for a while with how to show up online in a way that is meaningful and intentional for me. Your thoughts on just showing up as myself without the hoops has really got me thinking. Thank you.
Sarah! I am in such a similar place.
It feels like such a moment of clarity in what I want to spend time and energy on. I’m really excited to see where this takes me. 💫
I love this idea you've been exploring! I've been dreaming of a gift economy offline as well.
Also, semi-related - I finished the first book in the Wheel of Time series this week! I'm waiting for the second to come in through Libby and am looking forward to diving in. I think I could easily overwhelm myself with fandom things so if you have any specific recommendations for people who are new, I'd love to check them out.
That is a great question. I should make a page for this.
Start here!
WoT parodies without any spoilers past Book 1. This captures the spirit of the fandom. https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLATv7QMhEv6-g2Q9noEoh4Xw51nOnu6tm&si=aJdLwTBAR8Jz1frS
If you want podcasts you can start with one of these. They are first time readers so go back in the archives and it would be like listening with friends. https://x.com/JessicaSqueedai/status/1814403054340366790
Discord is probably the best place to actually get to know people. We are really good about keeping spoilers to certain channels for new readers. If you're interested in that (or Twitter) send me an email and I'll get you connected and introduce you.
Thank you so much! I'm excited to go through these! I still don't use discord much and got rid of Twitter (while it was still called Twitter) but I'll let you know if I get up the nerve to try discord!
I was just writing about this same topic this morning. I'm so sick of being told that I need a value proposition. I'm a person, not a product.
I wonder if it has to do with net neutrality being repealed in 2017? They just voted to reinstate it this year.
This, exactly this! I think it's really bad for our mental health to be constantly questioning what value we can provide. We are innately valuable as humans and we need each other outside of a financial exchange model.
Oh yes yes yes. This resonates.
I specially decided to CHANGE CAREERS because of the toxicity of the online-content-creator environment in 2020. Since then I have gone to school for two separate skill sets that “have nothing to do with the internet.” But it hasn’t totally worked.
Anything that isn’t entrepreneurial doesn’t hit my creative needs. Anything that IS entrepreneurial requires “an internet presence.”
BUT- your mindset.
The idea of sharing internet gifts and ignoring the “rules of monetization.” That’s something I could get behind.
Am I on the right track?
"We are sailing in the same ship." (I was once told this by a stranger on the London Underground when she realized I was just as lost as she was.) 😂
As you know, I've been circling this particular whirlpool for YEARS trying to find a balance. But it feels like each loop of the spiral I'm getting closer.
The rules are made up and we get to show up and engage in our own ways. It's just hard to remember that when it feels like swimming against the current of everything we've been taught.
I think one of the spectrums of neurodivergence is between the rebels and rule followers. I've always been a rule follower, but the older that I get I think we have a lot to learn from our rebel neurokin.
1. That quote creates this beautiful scene in my head. Thank you for that.
2. I used to think I followed the rules because “that’s how good people” did it. And (thanks upbringing) that is/ was part of it. But also- it’s easier. It’s easier to not rock the ship. It is easier to not go against the grain. It is easier to be a little lazy and follow the rules. Also- there is very little muscle memory “oh I know how this works,” in rebellion.
3. Thank you for allowing me to think out loud in your space.
I can totally get behind the idea of sharing gifts offline. I just started my own business (I'm a mental health therapist in my "real life"?). I've found that while we do need a psychology today profile, I don't get as many clients from this as one may think. My biggest source of referrals are from other therapists who either know me IRL or whose clients have found me and loved me so they added me to their referral list. It's so beautiful to see members of the mental health community helping each other in the private practice setting. You'd think there'd be this competition for clients, but it's just not like that. It would be so amazing if more areas of work were like this now. They used to be before the Internet!
Yes, I think it's easy to get lost in the weeds a bit. There are a lot of people teaching best practices, but the truth is what works will be unique for each of us. I love that you've found a collaborative community for your therapy work. We need more of that!
I love this so much. I keep going back and forth on how to create and be a part of this community space with what I create and share. Even visibility, if you’re not trying to sell things feels like the attention economy. Thank you for the encouragement and practical ideas. And the reminder that we don’t have to build brands. We get to be a part of a community, a movement.
Yes! Even the framework of "attention economy" has an extractive feeling to me. A competition for eyeballs. The beauty of the gift economy is that you gift your time and energy to receiving other people's gifts as well. You don't show up, promote your content, and peace out. If there are enough people doing this it creates a reciprocity of attention that is genuine and authentic. Thank you for commenting.
This brought back memories of ICQ & Ask Jeeves & this really cool website that I loved - I’ve forgotten the name - that worked as a great discovery tool for topics/subjects you errr interested in. It was set up as these different boards & it would send you on wonderful voyages of discovery. I’m so tired of the noise around personal branding and funnels and constant marketing, and the call to monetize everything. I’m trying to find a happy medium between having some things for sale but just letting most things be part of the gift economy.
Yes, just this. It doesn't have to be all or nothing. We can have some paid offerings and offer others as gifts.
I wonder if you mean Stumble Upon? I miss that serendipity of the Internet now that everything feels so optimized.
Oh no. This was way before Stumble Upon. I used the site a lot in the late 90s.
Stumble Upon was good too! I found some really cool sites that way too.
Gotcha. I didn't use Stumble Upon myself so I couldn't place it in a timeline. Maybe it was the precursor to it.
Yes, I imagine it was.
I love this with my whole heart. I was deeply part of the old internet, of blogging (for free!), of gifting knowledge (for free!), of making friends that would often cross into real life.
I think it changed when Twitter hit a tipping point. people started leaving blogging in 2012 or so. I was resistant as could be but finally left blogging too.
I think this is my struggle here. how do I balance this. and I honestly don't know.
Social media was definitely part of the shift. I stopped blogging because no one commented anymore and just used Instagram instead because that's where the people were. I don't have all the answers, but based on the comments and replies we aren't the only ones feeling this way.
hopeful, certainly!
I’m becoming a firm believer that things will appear when you need them most and my, did I need this! I’ve been struggling for a while with how to show up online in a way that is meaningful and intentional for me. Your thoughts on just showing up as myself without the hoops has really got me thinking. Thank you.
Thank you Su! I’m glad to hear that it resonated.